There are times when life is just great. You're feeling happy and confident, on top of your game. But other times - and sometimes, out of nowhere - things go downhill. Tragedies, accidents, stressful events, conflicts, hostility - we all face these things at some point. How do you continue being the best self you can be, in spite of what you're going through?
I'd like to share a little bit of my experience trying to make the most of a bad situation, and offer a few suggestions on how you might be able to deal with bad situations in a healthy, constructive way.
Falling and getting up...
This year, a lot of events are occurring for me that bear similarity to those of last year. Like last year, I'm dealing with career changes, new work spaces, and challenges to trust Spirit. I've noticed that when my life's events happen in a cyclical, repetitive pattern, it's a call to recognize my lessons and further learn from them.
Last summer, I experienced a trying situation that came up out of nowhere. It involved a personal conflict between me and a fellow lightworker. The situation left me feeling angry, hateful, and wanting to give up on my psychic work. After all, business had been very slow in the last month, and this conflict brought all my feelings of insecurity to the surface.
I went home and prayed about the situation. Part of me wanted to run away - pack up my office, and quit being a psychic altogether. I knew that was the "easy" way out, and a very poor decision. So I asked Spirit: "How can I respond to this in the best possible way, honoring You and the highest good of all?"
Spirit's response? "Build an altar."
I was confused. I wanted concrete instructions on how I could step forward, but instead Spirit told me to give it time, and be in a sacred state of mind while I waited for the real solution.
I followed, building my altar, asking for peace and clarity. And a few days later, the earthly instruction came - "Do your work. Help others."
So I put myself out there in a radical way, offering two weeks of pay-what-you-can readings.
Client after client came through my door. I read for people of all ages and walks of life, all in remarkably unique situations. I found myself called to help them all with an honest heart, free of judgment.
Looking back, it was my chance to redeem myself, to practice being kind and compassionate after coming out of a situation where I only felt anger and resentment.
The only regret I have about my response to that situation was that although I ended up caring for others, I neglected to care for myself.
...and falling and getting up again
Last week, I had a shockingly similar experience to the conflict I described above. Again, it was an argument between me and a fellow lightworker. And again, it came totally out of left field and caught me off guard.
But I remembered last year's situation, and how I was called to respond to it. This time, I made sure to take care of myself, as well as others. I reached out to several friends, mutually sharing conversation and support. I allowed myself time and space to honor my feelings and work through them. And I made an active effort to reach out to some folks I knew were going through a tough time, and offer them kindness. I'm still in my process, so I offer this experience to you from a vulnerable place. It's been tough and definitely emotionally challenging, but I ultimately want to be my best self, and continue to rise in love and kindness, as tempting as it may be to let myself go down into a negative spiral.
The "How To" Part
It's very important to reconize that the following are not hard and fast rules. They're just suggestions that have worked well for me. Your mileage will likely vary. But here ya go:
1. Allow yourself to feel what you're feeling, no matter how crappy it is.
Nope, you don't have to forgive right away, you don't have to take it like a champ, you don't have to get over it. Be with yourself where you are - in your hurt, anger, grief, whatever it is that you're feeling.
2. Ask "How would my best self respond?"
Important: There's no pressure here. Nobody gets to decide the "best self" standard but you. It's YOUR best self, after all.
3. Channel your energy into loving, compassionate acts
Whether this is simply treating yourself with care, or reaching out to others. I suggest both. This is your chance to remember that you actually do have some goodness left in you. And you might be surprised by how big that goodness can blossom out of you.
What do you think?
What's your personal strategy for dealing with the worst situations? What do you hope to experience as you respond to them? I'd love to hear what you have to offer.
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